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Derek and Clive
Comic dialogues from Peter Cook and Dudley Moore, with copious swearing

Derek and Clive was a double act of comedic characters created by Dudley Moore (Derek) and Peter Cook (Clive) in the 1970s. The performances were captured on the records Derek and Clive (Live) (1976), Derek and Clive Come Again (1977), and Derek and Clive Ad Nauseum (1978), as well as in a film documentary, Derek and Clive get the Horn (1979). A greatest hits Album containing some previously unreleased material, called Rude & Rare: The Best of Derek and Clive, was released in 2011. The characters are foul-mouthed extensions of the earlier characters Pete and Dud.

Considered highly offensive by many at the time, the sketches primarily took the form of bizarre, sometime drunken streams of consciousness led by Cook, with interjections from Moore. Memorable moments from the records include Clive claiming that the worst job he ever had was retrieving Lobsters from Jayne Mansfield's ar*ehole, Derek claiming his worst job was cleaning up Winston Churchill's bogeys (leading the pair to conclude that the Titanic was one such bogey), Clive claiming that he was sexually aroused by the sight of a deceased Pope lying in state, and a horse-racing 'commentary' featuring horses named after sexual organs or their vulgarised derivatives.

Though the recordings were far too crude for a mainstream audience, Derek and Clive bootleg recordings circulated. They were mostly unscripted dialogues incorporating copious swearing - including frequent use of the word "C*nt".

  1. Come Again (87Mb)
  2. Live (56.1Mb)

MP3 files hosted by archive.org.